Fun Things To Think About On Saturday

This is just for fun, so kick back and enjoy the play on words - if you don't at least smile at some of these you must be having a hard time coming to grips with reality.

But hey, not to worry, just think about how cool it would be to be a conservative where knowing the truth about life and it's ups and downs will definitely bring a smile to your face. After all, as the saying goes, "know the truth and the truth will set you free".

Heh - so relax and enjoy the freedom by keeping the faith, being able to laugh is winning the battle. I edited out some that were not ' smiley' ones.

Philosophy of Ambiguity For those who love the philosophy of ambiguity...here's to you!

2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor....

3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

7. What if there were no hypothetical questions?

8. If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash hishands with soap?

9. If someone with multiple personalities threatens tokill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

10. Is there another word for synonym?

11. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from itall?"

12. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

13. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish hiswages?

14. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

18. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

19. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?

21. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

22. One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people.

24. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoyadultery?

26. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

27. Can an atheist get insurance against acts of God?

28. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

29. Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" tohave "S" in it?

30. Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" insteadof "assteroids"?